I now know what a fish out of water must feel like. It is so incredibly strange to be the extreme minority. Not to understand what is being said all around you and to feel so helpless. When we came to Korea, we expected many to be able to speak English and although there are some who can speak, there are few who are fluent and they only speak in English when forced into it, because they do not believe they speak well enough. It is a helpless feeling indeed to not understand what is being said nor to be understood.
When you hear of missionaries and their stories of sharing Jesus, seeing peoples saved, discipling others. It is easy to forget that they must go through the day to day of life as well. Today has been one of those rigamous days. A day of being home with the kids alone while my husband was gone. A day of walking to the market filled with high priced unknown things. Not knowing what to buy nor what to do with it when I get home
For me, the bells and whistles died out rather quickly and the shock of what this year will entail has set in. The smells, the sights, the sounds. The huge language barriers that stand as a gulf between myself and everyone around. Being tired and lonely and wanting nothing more than my own bed, a good hamburger and to be understood. “Lord God, help me to embrace this culture, to love the people and all they represent, to not compare but to welcome the differences.
Adjusting to a different culture, a different way of life, a different language is not easy. There are many days when I just want to hide inside and pretend I am safe back at home. Yet, if I were to do this, I would not be fulfilling the Lord’s call upon my life. For He did not call me to come and hide, He called me to come and share Jesus. To make disciples, to be His hand and His feet. Oh, may I not forget why I have come.